Who am I to Complain?

I have been on an emotional roller coaster this month. I have to deal joy to the highest level all the way down to the pit of despair. I have pouted when things didn't go my way and bounced off the walls when I was overly excited. I don't understand now what the Lord has store for us. It is frustrating to not know what He is doing. I am glad I can depend on him to take care of us. We are planning on moving again. For the last 11 years of my life I have moved every two years, except for the 4 years I lived in Germany. I am SICK and TIRED of moving. I crave stability. I know one day my prayers will be answered but right now I am a little frustrated. Thankfully I can have stability in my Saviour!
Today on the way to taking Curtis to school/home from school we listened to the story behind the hymn "It Is Well With My Soul." That is my most favorite hymn! Listen for yourself the story behind this amazing song!


I have nothing to complain about. This story and song brought me to a place of conviction. If this is all I have to deal with I am doing pretty good. There are children who are starving, there are men and women sacrificing their lives daily and leaving a family behind, there are children and adults battle all kinds of diseases, i could go on and on. Yes my pain is real, but everyone hurts. Who or what I turn to in my hurt defines who we are. I am going to try and always turn to Jesus. I want to say in hard times and good, It is well with my soul! May God bless you

Proud to be an American

Hello Friends, I hope you are all doing well. I am very very proud of our country. Yesterday our first African American president was sworn into office. I honestly never thought that I would live to see that day. Thank you America for tearing down the racial barriers of this country. 50 years ago we going through civil rights and many many leaders rose up and stood their ground about the injustices being done. Many many people shed there blood just trying to get the right to vote, to get the same rights as everyone else and to just live a normal life and look at us now. WOW I am am honored to have witnessed history unfold. I did not vote for Barack Obama (because I don't agree with him on key issues), but I do believe that the Lord has a plan for our nation. The Lord is still in control and I know he is proud of how far our country has come.
As president Bush gets back to "normal" life in Texas, I wonder what his reflection is about these last 8 years. I am proud of Bush and all he did. I may not agree with it all, but I don't know the whole story and I am not going to pretend I do. I am torn that our nation is at war and we have lost and will continue to loose innocent people, but at the same time our country is better off because of the fight this brave souls. So thank you president Bush for doing what you thought was best for our country. President Bush took care of Veterans and military personnel. Every January we get a pay raise. Not little one, but usually around $50-100 a year. He made sure that they were not forgotten. He truly has a heart for this nation and tried to do his best with what he had. My dear friend Ann had this video posted on here facebook account and I thought it was awesome. So I will leave you with that. Thank you America, what a ride you have been on. May the next 4 years be AWESOME!

An end to a wonderful, challenging year!

I am sitting here looking back at 2008 and I am awe struck at what the Lord has done in my and my families lives, my friends lives. I have to start back in fall of 2007. At that time we were attending a huge church in Clackamas. The Lord made it clear to me that I need stop all leadership positions that I was in. My husband and I were small group leaders, I was table leader for the women's bible study, and the hospitality coordinator for our churches MOPS group. I was pretty good at what I was doing and when I prayed about it and was complaining to God ( I don't recommend doing that) that I didn't want to quit, He in His gracious ways showed me where I was overly stressed, how I wasn't up to par on being a mother and a wife, and most importantly how I was not spending as much time as I could nurturing my relationship with Him. So I quit everything he told me too. It was like pulling teeth, but I obeyed. In November of 2007 I started volunteering 1 day a week in the kitchen of CCS. I am beginning to see why he chose that path for me. I enjoy life a lot more then I ever have. Now jump into 2008. Joe and I celebrated our 8 year anniversary in January. In February we celebrated Joe's 29th birthday by going to the Ft. Stevens on the coast and staying in a Yurt for the very first time.

We had a blast! Amazingly the weather was nice. It rained at night and was clear during the day! We will continue to Yurt in the future.

In March we celebrated Curtis' 8th birthday. He is just an amazing child and I love watching him grow. He is incredibly smart, and loves to study about people in history. He also has a heart for people and I excited to see how the Lord works through him.
April came with another birthday. Shayla turned 3 years old. She was so looking forward to being three. She grown a lot this year. She is an amazing little girl. Very creative and loving. She loves Jesus with all her heart.

The month of May bring Memorial day. We have made it a tradition to go up to Willamette National Cemetery and lay flowers on the graves of two fallen soldiers. One of the graves we lay flowers on in remembrance all those who lost their life defending our freedom. We are extremely grateful for what they have done. The other grave we lay flowers on because who the person was and what a sad loss it is to have lost them. We wish we could skip over the month of May because it brings up a lot of emotions. I think it is good to revisit those emotions and try and continue to heal from losses we have had in our lives. It just is tough.June, so sweet June. I told the Lord that I would not want to attend The Country Church because I didn't want to go to church at the same place where Curtis goes to school. Too much drama in my mind. Well I learned that you never tell God what to do. I should know this, but I guess I had to try again and see if I could win. I didn't and we started attending TCC on Wednesday nights, then it lead to Sunday mornings. I am soooooooooooooooooooooo glad and grateful that the Lord knows what he is doing. We have never ever felt so loved and spiritually fed as we do at TCC. We left our church in Clackamas. We are now attending TCC only. Amazing church.

July, we Yurted again in Newport, Oregon. We went whale watching and saw two whales. It was a neat experience. We also went to the aquarium and toured the Rogue Beer factory. We also visited a couple light houses and just played around!

Oh the fun we had in Newport! Curtis and Joe were able to go behind the scenes at the aquarium and got to feed the seals then they got their pictures taken while they were being kissed on the cheek by a seal.

August is by far my most favorite month of the year! We went on our BIGGEST and best vacation yet. We road tripped down to California. Our first stop was the redwood forest. We camped in a park off the Avenue of the Giants. It was awesome to pitch a tent among those HUGE trees.

Then our next stop was the water park in Antioch. Then it was to our next camping destination, Mt Diablo. It was horrible horrible horrible. Did I mention HORRIBLE. We were at a 3,000 foot elevation and the park shut off all the water to the showers so we had to be very creative with water bottles. It was dry and our camp site was elevated downhill so it felt like we gonna roll down the mountain. Then at 2am the stinkin raccoons came out and somehow got a corner of our garbage out of the bear box and Joe got in a fight with them. He was beating them with water bottles and throwing water on them. Finally they went away long enough for Joe to throw the trash in the cab of the truck. Then an hour later they came back and stole the water bottle caps that Joe left on the ground. They also tried to take off with Joe's pills and Shayla's shoe. Crazy animals I tell you. It was a riot to listen to Joe yelling at them. Luckily we only had to stay there two nights. Then we went to Vallejo California to go to Six flags, a big highlight for my boys. Shayla was able to feed, dance, and kiss a dolphin. The boys were able to go on the scary roller coasters. Joe has been waiting for his son to be taller then 52"Then we headed down to Modesto to see friends, then headed to my sisters up at Hume Lake. My sister works at Hume Lake Christian Camp outside of Fresno California. We had lots of fun on all our adventures. The Lord knew how hard this fall/winter were going to so be blessed us with a family bonding road trip. We grew together as a family. We also listened to a lot of Adventures in Odyssey tapes.

September was a door opener for our family. I was given the opportunity to run the kitchen at CCS all by myself for a week in while MaMa B went on a much needed vacation. The Lord really opened up my eyes. Being in the kitchen brings me more joy then any of those other leadership position ever did. I am now volunteering three days a week in the kitchen. I LOVE BEING IN THERE. That is where the Lord has chosen for me to be. I can take Shayla with me and that is a blessing! Also, Curtis started 3rd grade this year and Joe started school September 29th. The Veterans Administration (VA) is paying for him to go to school. Joe is getting into the career field of Computer Aided Drafting. That was the field that Lord picked for Joe. Joe was obedient and signed up for those courses not too sure he would like them. Well he fell in love Computer Aided Drafting. He received a 4.0 GPA this term. He did that while going to school full time, working part time and raising a family. I am so proud of him and his hard work.

October was when we realized how much the people at TCC really love us. We were blessed abundantly with their generosity and support. We hit a rough patch and the Lord put people in our path and helped us get caught up! God is so good. Also in October Curtis got baptized. We asked him why he wanted to be baptized, he told me that God told me to.
I turned 30 in November. It was a good day. My mommy made me dinner and we had Apple Pie for dessert. Then Thanksgiving came and it was a wonderful day. First I quit my team in the family Turkey Bowl indefinitely because of unfair play. My grandparents were able to come down from Wenatchee. It was good to see them. I am thankful for the Lord for healing my Grandpa of the numerous things he had to endure this year! The food was amazing as always.

Christmas is here! December was interesting month for everyone here in the Portland area. We had the most wicked storm the area has seen in 30 years. We had a total of 8 inches, my parents got up to 14 inches. It was a mess for a while. It has been a blessing for us as well. Because of the weather and the hours the company lost during the storm, mean lots of hours forJoe so they can all catch up on the work they missed.

Christmas was awesome. I was with family, the best way to celebrate the day. I am thankful the Lord gave us his son as a gift to us. Thank you Lord. We also found out after Christmas that teh owner of the house we are renting is not willing to lower our rent so we will be looking for a new place to live. God is in control. I am not worried. He already has ironed out the details, I just need trist and faith and the Spirt will lead us in the right direction!
That is the year in a wrap. With today being December 31st 2008, I would like to say Thank you Lord for an amazing ride. I couldn't blog all of what He has done for us in a year. I am glad I follwed the Lord and chose to give up the things I thought I loved. I love what I am doing now, and where I am headed! Oh, one of my favorite things this year came to me by phone. My favorite and bestest friend in the whole wide world called me and told me her 9 year old son rode his bike around the block for the first time. Why is this important you say, Leif, her son has Aspergers. (a form of Autism) The doctors told her and her family that because of Leif's lack of coordination that he would never ride a bike. Well guess what he did, and I am positive that Jesus made that happen. I look forward to seeing him ride for myself. One day when we are Kansas maybe! So in 2009 I choose love more deeply, laugh even harder, and live for Jesus even more! Happy New year friends!

What we do in December!

I love hearing stories of how people celebrate all the various holiday's in December. In our house we keep Christ in Christmas. My kids love the Salvation Army bell ringers. I have started to put all my change in my center console of my car. They will hear the bell ringers in the parking lot and grab change so they can help others. They look forward to the bell ringers every year! I love there generous hearts. From the beginning of their lives we have taught them that giving is way more important then receiving. Here is a peek into our December traditions.
We have found a way to include "Santa" or as we like to call it St. Nick. In case you don't know Nicholas was the Bishop of Myra, a city in Lycia (modern day Turkey) He lived in the fourth century. He was a great man from what I have read about him. The story we hear the most about is how he saved the 3 sisters who couldn't get married because they had no dowry. He prayed for this family for a while and the Lord layed it on his heart to give each girl a certain amount of money. He put each amount into small bags and headed out to there house in the middle of the night. He slid open a window and tossed in the money and the bags landed near the girls shoes. That is where "Santa " started. There are many versions of this story, but I do believe that he did help this family out. When we lived in Germany we were introduced to St. Nick. December 6th, the day Nicholas died, is celebrated all over in Germany. The children would put there boots outside their bedroom door and a small gift would be in the boots the next morning. I also remember in our town the kids would take there boots and go around from one business to the other collecting candy. Kind of like our trick or treating. We have decided to keep that tradition going. On the night December 5th our children put their boots outside their bedroom door. In the morning of the 6th there is a present or a few small presents waiting for each of them to open. Then we are all done with the "Santa" part and we can focus on what Christmas is all about, the birth of Jesus! I remember last Christmas our daughter was asked by a clerk at the grocery store if she was getting excited about Santa to come and Shayla, who was 2 1/2 said " Santa already came now it is about Jesus" So I explained to clerk what my daughter was talking about. Such a cute memory.
In 2005 when we moved back to the states from Germany we started another family tradition and we have doing it ever since. On December 24, my hubby, the kids and I open the presents under our tree. Then I will go get a dozen doughnuts and make a huge breakfast, it usually turns out to be brunch. Then we play with our gifts then around dinner time we will pile in the car and head to my parents for an overnighter and eat homemade clam chowder and then go to my parents church for the Christmas Eve service. Christmas morning my mom will make an incredible breakfast of eggs, bacon/sausage, and her wonderful cinnamon rolls. Then we will open the presents under her tree. The thing I enjoy the most about waking up on Christmas morning is knowing that my three sibling and I will be able to wake up together. Just like when we were little. I know it means alot to my parents to have us all together. On Christmas night my aunts, uncles, cousins, friends will come over for a huge prime rib dinner. Christmas for me is about family. I have a wonderful family, we all share the same faith. Christ has given us the gift of himself, and also the gift of family! Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

Please don't forget!

I am going to try my hardest to type this without becoming a puddle on the floor. My husband Joe, almost lost his life numerous times while serving under our flag, so for him and countless others I am asking everyone of you to pause for a moment and say a prayer for the men and women who are in harms way protecting us. These brave warriors are fighting for our freedom to celebrate these upcoming holidays. As a former Army wife who proudly served along side her man for almost 8 years, Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas!

My hubby's Christmas tree in his room while serving in Iraq

(Left to Right) Joe my hubby, Kevin Kochell, Michael

Being a warrior

Christian Sisters

What makes me weak?

My fears.
What makes me whole?

My God
What keeps me standing?

My faith.
What makes me compassionate?

My selflessness.
What makes me honest?

My integrity.
What sustains my mind?

My quest for knowledge.
What teaches me all lessons?

My mistakes.
What lift's my head high?

My pride, not arrogance.
What if I can't go on?

Not an option.
What makes me victorious?

My courage to climb.
What makes me competent?

My confidence .
What makes me sensual?

My insatiable essence.
What makes me beautiful?

My everything.
What makes me a woman?

My heart .
Who says I need love?

I do.
What empowers me?

My God & Me.
Who am I?

I AM A STRONG CHRISTIAN WOMAN!

( I did not write this)

I love this poem, or whatever you call it. It got my brain thinking again! I was watching a movie the other day and one thing struck my mind. I don't know the exact words that were said, but I remember the point. The point was this. We are not afraid of failing as much as we are afraid of succeeding. I know I am. I am afraid to do somethings in my life not because of failing, but because of the effort I will have to put into it and the fact that I will accomplish something and also that I am good enough to do the task. I am not talking about normal everyday tasks. I am talking about when someone asks you to something. I need to have more confidence in myself and believe in myself to accomplish what someone already knows I can do. I have been hearing a lot lately that we need to try and see ourselves the way God does. Obviously God thinks I am amazing and I need to believe that I am amazing too. So I am going to try my hardest this Christmas season and into the next year to believe in myself more. The Lord equipped me with the Spiritual gifts of service, mercy and hospitality. Also, my occupation is a wife, mother, and working in the lunch room at CCS (Country Christian) He knows I can operate in all areas of my life, not just a little bit in all of them. I want to be a warrior for Christ and accomplish all He has laid before me.

I will stand behind Obama, because I am a proud American!

This blog may rub some of you wrong and I am sorry that you will feel that way, I am not sorry what what I wrote. On November 4, 2008 our nation witnessed history. Barrack Obama, is going to become our first black president. That is so amazing! No I did not vote for the man, and I am a little nervous about his stand on some key issues, but that doesn't mean I cannot support the man. I choose to support him in prayer! I never in my life time thought that I would ever get to witness our country elect a black president. I am proud we did! I pray he will be the best president that God can make him be. I pray that he will join and rise this nation up, and not bring us down. Prayer changes things.

So I am asking you as nicely as I can to please SHUT UP with all the mouth vomit about Obama. Most of it is not true and if you believe everything you hear about him or what he is going to do you are a fool. All of us republicans need to put on our big girl panties and deal with this situation. I am tired of the racist comments, the comments about his family, how he is going to destroy Kenya, how he is gonna do this and that. The man hasn't even walked 5 minutes in Bush' shoes and I hope when he does he will think really hard about some of the decisions he wants to make. As Christians we need to get back to basics. Romans 13:1-2 states: Let every soul be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God. Therefore whoever resits the authority resists the ordinance of God, and those who resist will bring judgement on themselves. The Bible is very clear as to what we should do. Here is another verse that we need to cling to in this interesting times. Romans 12:9-13 states: Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good. Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another, not lagging in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord; rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer, distributing to the the needs of the saints, given to hospitality.
As believer's be need to quiet our mouths and hearts and get on our knees and pray. Philippians 4:6-7 states: Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
As I close this I want to remind you of something we all know, but sometimes forget. God is still on the throne, He hasn't been knocked off. In the end He gets the victory! Satan has an extremely short leash and everything he destroys or seeks to destroy the Lord will build up again for His glory. No matter what color, or party our leaders are in, our God reigns forever and ever. So please I am asking all of you who truly love this wonderful country of ours stand behind our president. Cover him and his family with prayer. Do not be quick to judge. I was in that boat to, but my perspective has changed I hope yours does to! I leave you with this amazing video. I know you have heard this time and time again but really listen and see how much the Lord has done in the African American community since Dr. King made this speech! What a mighty God we serve!



I see no color, I hope you don't either! May the Lord continue to fulfill his plan for this great nation!